Tuesday, 26 May 2009

Lee Myung-Bak Praises Kim Jong-Il's Nuclear Test for "Raising Korea's International Profile"

Beleaguered South Korean President Lee Myung-bak praised North Korean dictator Kim Jong-il for his successful nuclear test early this morning.
"My press agent told me that any news is good news, and really, it's thrilling to see Korea making headlines around the world."

After a several month dry spell with Korean news nowhere on the international radar, including Bo-A's failure to surpass Beyonce on US pop charts, President Lee had begun to worry that people had forgotten about Korea.

Fortunately, Kim Jong-il's bomb test is not only just the thing to get people talking about Korea: "It's a buzz-word again!" but this bomb's output was much, much higher than North Korea's previous nuclear test.

"Really, with such a big blast, we're predicting a new kind of 'North Korean Wave' where fear and anxiety over North Korea's next move will raise Korea's profile even further. With such brand exposure, it's a simple matter of managing the image a little to attract tourists and Foreign Direct Investment."

Asked whether he could provide more details, whether such an event fit into a strategy, President Lee deferred to his new minister of Tourism, Branding, and Self-congratulation, Chang Tae-pyong.

"While strategies are good for some countries that do not share Korea's illustrious history, like, for example, China, given the spectacular superiority of Korea's great nation, a few buzz-words and a bitchin' slogan will be enough for Korea to rise to recognition, and indeed, true greatness. Our ally in Korea's climb to true world leadership, Kim Jong-il, sees the importance of Korean branding, and name recognition: surely, great dividends will come to both dear sister-sparkling-states."

Kim Jong-il was not available for comment.

1 comment:

Korean Rum Diary said...

Presidential suicide, nuclear bombs, Swine Flu... Korea is finally centre of the universe.