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"You see, it started last Sunday after I got together with some of my Anti-English Spectrum activists, following a white person in our neighborhood. We picked up his trail as he left church with a Korean woman, and also her Korean husband and children, and we followed him furtively to this Korean woman's apartment building, where he was obviously planning to have adulterous sex with her at knifepoint in front of her family, scarring the precious pure-blood Korean children for life. We followed him to the apartment building, and then threw rocks through the window of their apartment and shouted "Yankee Go Home!" and to prevent the degradation of that Korean woman, we shouted, "You're a whore to associate with Western men!" and other swear words we learned from watching American movies. God I love Tarantino. Don't you? Then, satisfied that we had prevented him from violating yet another pure Korean family, and degrading Korean women yet again, we decided to celebrate our bravery with a visit to the room salon."
"There, while celebrating our brave actions protecting Korea's pure han women by watching a titty show, and congratulating each other for helping Korean women to stay virtuous by buying each other lap-dances, you know, to help these pure Korean virgins pay for school, I felt an empty feeling.
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"Virtuous Han females?" Dokdo Is Ours asked.
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"And you had this revelation..."
"At a titty bar. Yes. I have all my best ideas about how to respect and protect Korea's virtuous women at the titty bar."
"So," the intrepid journalist Dokdo Is Ours asked, "Who are some of the Korean citizens you would deem unworthy of Korean females?"
"Well, first of all, those presumptuous snobs who have more money than I do. Those shallow pricks have got to go. Ship'em off to America or something. Second, all the lazy slobs who have less money than me -- they have no ability to provide for Korea's virtuous women, so they have to go, too. To China, I guess. Deport them wherever. I don't care."
"Anybody else?"
"Those fancy-boys who are handsomer than I am have to stop putting on their stupid airs and leave the country. Also, all those disgusting jerks uglier than me are not worthy of staying in Korea. The pretentious phoneys who have more education than I do are disqualified from being with one of Korea's pure women, and the idiots with less education than me are also unworthy, of course."
"And don't you think Korea's women have the intelligence, and should have the freedom, to choose the partner they want?"
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"So you've decided not to rest until every Korean man except yourself is expelled from Korea."
"That's right! So many men getting laid, and I'm not one of them! If my looks, money, education and manners, along with my expansive, open-mind and tolerant attitude are not enough to lead a woman to my protrusive embrace, then let them come to me because I'm the only man left in Korea!"
"And what do the other members of the Anti-English spectrum think about this?"
"As long as they can stay in Korea after all the other men have been expelled, they're all for it."
"How will you achieve this kind of a goal?"
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It seemed a prudent time to end the interview.
Dokdo Is Ours, Reporting.
8 comments:
He is indeed an ugly, ugly bastard.
Well, that is the "solution" here in this country- that is do everything by attempted monopoly. Any Korean with enough English to trick parents can go and start doing tutoring. They don't license themselves either. These people are doing the Hagwons dirty work for them- or the Devil's Work. All of you involved with this stalker, do us a favor and kill yourselves. Seriously, do it.
He got served. I'll bet his dick doesnt go past his pubic hair. I'll bet he masterbates nightly with the lonely tears of a no pussy getting hater.
Oh yah, and if I ever caught this guy following me, I beat him and his friends up and then flee to Takeshima.
This can't possibly be real. This has to be a parody of some sort.
Oh no... It's very real...
And yeah, this dick should be dragged to Takeshima, kicking and screaming all the way.
A bit over-the-top, but probably spot on. I've decided I like your blog, maybe more than the Yangpa. And, yes, Keith, this guy does exist in our very unreal world ...
Thanks, Bobster!
(Dokdo Is Ours, too lazy to log on)
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