Wednesday 1 April 2009

Upset By Expat Comment Boards, Dooly the Dokdo Dinosaur Ends His Life

Dooly, the lovable animated dinosaur well-known in Korean animation history, has tragically ended his life. During a twenty-year plus career on Korean television, after gaining thousands, maybe millions of fans, Dooly shocked children and adults alike with his suicide.

Dooly has a long history of supporting Korea's claim of the Dokdo Islands in Korea's East Sea, but apparently he has been hurt too deeply by the mean-spirited comments regarding Dokdo on expat blogs.

The Chosun Ilbo was quick to publish a photo slideshow of the suicide site, where Dooly ended his life by ingesting large quantities of seagull excrement and feathers, and announced it will be providing a live internet feed of the funeral, with black carpet commentary by popular Korean game show host Kang Ho Dong.

When asked for comments on the shocking turn, few netizens wanted to speak up, but Gerry Bevers claimed he was in close and frequent correspondence with Dooly, though he would not reveal what nature those correspondences took.

"I wrote him, oh, ten e-mails a day or so, you know, giving him advice on what he should do to support his Dokdo claim, and what he could do with his maps. I'm sure he'll be missed by his friends," Mr. Bevers said, "We disagreed about certain things, but I hope he read between the lines of my polemics and saw the warm affection I had for him."

A short suicide note named several major Korea blogs, and also several commenters well-known to those who move around the Korea blogs. Due to Korean privacy laws, names will be blanked out in Dokdo Is Ours' exclusive reprint of the suicide note's text.

"***** ****** your nasty comments cut me too deep, at ******'s H*** and also at ****'s *** C***. I saw no warm affection in them. Me spend too much time fighting for Dokdo, and ***** just say rude things. Me so sad. Me want end it all. Sorry kids. Don't try this at home."

Dooly's premature death leaves many Dokdo supporters in the lurch, upset and unsure who will lead Korea's Dokdo charge in Dooly's absence, and hopes are high that singer Kim Chang Hoon or poet Choi Yong Hearn would take up the mantle next.

The death of yet another popular Korean public figure has led to renewed calls for a real name commenting system to be enforced on the Korean internet, possibly even of foreign based websites.

Among the supporters of measures to limit negativity on Korea's blogs, both Korean and English blog hosts, was Maryland Scholar Jon Huer.

"Really, I don't think these low-brow, self-hating idiots with mental problems should be able to set the terms of the conversations. They're just poopy pants and ignorant bum heads, and I think they're dumb, but they're not the boss of me. So they should be sent to their rooms with a time out and no toys and they're doodee heads. MYAH! These guys just keep criticizing me and I don't know why. It must be because they're all idiots and sophomoric drug-addled low-moral-character bumholefaces. They should all be banned from the internet forever if they don't like my unique brand of witty, yet perceptive social commentary."

It remains to be seen whether the public outcry over yet another star suicide will lead to a change in Korea's internet laws, but even if they do, such changes will be too little, too late, to bring quietus to the bereaved fans of the lovable baby dinosaur Dooly.

Rest in Peace, Dooly.

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