Sunday 26 April 2009

Korea to change spelling of Instant Coffee to acknowledge Korea's Unique Food Culture

Chang Tae-Pyong has unveiled another step in his plan to bring Korean food to the world:

In order to rebrand Korean coffee and increase recognition of this unique Korean drink, we have decided it is time to differentiate our unique five-thousand year old drink from other drinks worldwide. From now on, we will not spell it "Instant Coffee" but "Insutanteu Coppee" to show the unique Koreanness of what was once called "Instant Coffee".

We think it is time to establish this unique brand of Korean coffee: it is sweeter than other countries' coffee, and convenient, because it is instant, reflecting modern Korea's quick economic development, and showing Korea's ancient culture of speedy, low-quality work. It is only through efforts like this that Korea will truly enter the world stage.

In order to establish brand prestige, Korean Instanteu Coppee will also be re-priced, from about fifty won per straw of instant coffee powder, to four thousand won per straw of Insutanteu Coppee.

"If Starbucks is only thirty years old, and they can charge 4000 won for a cup of coffee, our five thousand year old recipe is certainly worth more than that."

Asked whether there had been much interest in the newly priced, newly re-spelled Insutanteu Coppee, Mr. Chang shifted in his seat.

"The world will come around once they realize they are wrong. We cannot change our five-thousand year recipe just for them. They need to understand our culture. If necessary, we will correct their wrong opinion of Korean Insutanteu Coppee."

Dokdo Is Ours reporting.


DSW said...

Another brilliant post... Good work.

kushibo said...

Korean instant coffee rocks!

My brood and I used to call it "Victory Coffee," a 1984 reference.