Thursday 1 April 2010

God Sets World Record With April Fools Prank on Korea

The Almighty God of the universe (who seems to spend an inordinate amount of his attention on Earth) totally pwned Korea this year with a "sweet-ass april fools prank"

That's right. A heavenly pwn.

Not only was it a heavenly pwn, but God almighty visited it upon Korea not just for one day, but for an entire month.

"Normally, the calendar year goes 'January February March' and so forth... but this year, after all that olympic crap about the speed skaters - I mean, I created those guys, and love them like sons and daughters, and even I don't care about speed skating - I decided it was time for Korea to get it."

And what was the nature of Korea's Godly prank?

"Well, I was thinking about giving every Korean in the nation explosive diarrhea for an hour to finally shoot down that "Kimchi's good for you" thing - imagine the clean-up! Then I thought about turning every Kia, Hyundai and Ssangyong car into a Mazda, Toyota, or Nissan... but with all those Toyota accelerator mishaps, you know, if somebody dies, it's not a prank anymore: it's full-fledged mischief - and April 1st is a bad day for a smiting. So instead I decided to give Korea two Februaries and no May."

The remarkably gloomy weather this March, including a preposterous TWO snowfalls during freaking MARCH was nothing less than a prank on South Korea. "Maybe that'll learn 'em."

Other pranks God Almighty takes credit for around the world:
Crop circles (duh)
Every time a documentarian or newscaster gets upstaged by animals screwing in the background
Lolcats ("Nobody takes credit for inventing the first one, because I did.")
The bubonic plague ("now that I think back on it, that one might have gone a little too far. My Hands span galaxies: sometimes I get the scale wrong when I'm pranking.")
Those kooks advocating for Intelligent Design
Men who can't find the clitoris
North Korea's Ryugyeong Hotel
The French

1 comment:

์กฐ์•ˆ๋‚˜ said...

by my count it was definitely more than just two snowfalls...